One Year

One year ago today my family received devastating news. A year ago Dad was given 9-12 months to live. In January we were told that the cancer had spread to his brain. Two weeks later he was gone. It happened much faster than we thought it would. We had less than 4 months.

I came across this draft of a post I never finished. It doesn't express the loss I have felt over the past 8 months, but it does demonstrate my love and faith.

 

 Saying goodbye.

"10/17/12

I've had a week to digest the news. It's slowly leaking out. It is just as hard telling someone as it was the first time. Well, maybe not the first time because the first time was my sister, but the second.

Dad's doctors have tried 4 different chemotherapy drugs over the course of the past little over a year. There is nothing left to try. Bladder cancer cells grow and spread extremely fast. The specter of death has been behind the scenes for a year and a half. Now it is the elephant in the room. The unwanted guest that won't leave.

As we prepare ourselves for this new eventuality, our family is growing even closer (is that possible?). We've cried together. We've cried alone. We've prayed together. We've prayed alone. I'm grateful for the comforting spirit of the Holy Ghost. I know we are an eternal family. I know that we will be together again. This is certainly the hardest thing I've ever had to go through.

Why am I sharing something so personal? I started this blog to post about things that inspire and motivate me. Projects, recipes, shop updates, other artists, trips, places I've seen. Sometimes I feel like I am the only person who reads my blog, and that's okay. I've never been very good at expressing myself through writing, so blogging is a good exercise for me.

My dad is an amazing example to me. I'm so lucky to be his daughter."

I love you Daddy.

LIVESTRONG Day

Today is LIVESTRONG Day – The Lance Armstrong Foundation’s global day of action. Today we celebrate the 28 million people worldwide facing the disease and honor all those that have lost their lives in a tough fight.

Share your message of support by visiting LIVESTRONGday.org. For every message shared, generous donors have pledged to give the Lance Armstrong Foundation $1 towards programs and services that directly support people fighting cancer. Share via twitter or facebook. Over $100,000 has been donated so far.

"We fight to improve the lives of people affected by cancer."

Cancer Update

The Wilde men at Grandpa Wilde's grave last weekend for Memorial Day.

I haven't done an update on Dad's cancer for a while because, quite frankly, there hasn't been anything good to report. Before Christmas his PET scan showed that his chemotherapy was working. We were ecstatic! But a few months later his next scan showed that it had stopped being effective. So his doctors tried a different chemo drug. We haven't known how well that was working until last week---although thankfully the side effects have been less severe.

Dad's latest scan showed that the cancer has grown bigger in some places. The good news is that it is still not in any new organs or in his bones. He will begin a NEW chemo treatment this week. He will receive an injection every 8 days for 3 weeks and then have a week off, as opposed to the injections he has been getting every 21 days. He will have another scan in 2 months time to determine if this is working. We can only keep hoping and praying for the best. At least his Shingles are clearing up. It just seems like he can't catch a break. Although he is out golfing today, so for today he is a happy man!

Fighters WIN

There has been a battle raging since April when Dad was diagnosed with bladder cancer. In June his bladder, prostate, pelvic lymph nodes, urethra and appendix were removed. In July doctors told us that the cancer had spread. The last 9 weeks of chemotherapy have been HELL. Today he got the results from his latest PET scan and . . . 

the chemotherapy is working!!!

The cancer in his neck is half the size and the spot in his chest isn't visible. He will have two additional chemo infusions, so he won't be done until January, but we couldn't be more THRILLED! 

Dad has been AMAZING through this ordeal. He is so strong. Our faith has been strengthened. Our prayers have been answered. The next 12 weeks will still be challenging, but we can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.